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DOUBLE TAP TO ZOOM WITH PHONE OR TABLET Children (and the teens they will become) with insecure attachment patterns can have social problems that complicate friendships and rela- tionships. They have great difficulty deciphering where their boundaries end and the boundaries of others begin. And they don’t know whom to trust (Cozolino 2006). Healthy boundaries permit children and adults to determine how others can treat them, and empower them to say no, when it is essential for their security and health (Szalavitz and Perry 2010). A helpful children’s book about boundaries is Personal Space Camp by Julia Cook. Children with attachment trauma are preoccupied with separations and a change in teaching staff. Some children desperately try to be first and in control to avert being left out. Because of experiences of discon- nect with care providers and a life of always being on alert, they can present behaviors that are misinterpreted by adults as manipulation. Fur- ther complicating the teacher’s role, these students interpret standard dis- cipline as yet another rejection (Levine and Kline 2007). Another difficulty for young students with some form of insecure attachment patterns is understanding sequences of beginning, middle, and ending. Similarly, they may have trouble with understanding the passage of time and continuity, which can affect memory (Perry and Sza- lavitz 2006). To them, a past incidence of fear or rejection can become an ongoing situation, never ending. This can lead to a sense of hopelessness. Each of these examples of behavior is just that—an example. No one child will exhibit all of these issues, and just because a child does show a particular tendency or problem does not necessarily mean that he or she has had deeply traumatic attachment experiences. What it does mean is that educators who understand the connection between insecure attach- ments and behavioral missteps should pay attention to behavior that signals possibly deeper problems. Any concerns should increase commu- nication among the educator, the family, and other support staff such as tutors or counselors. Educators may have great difficultly not feeling anger toward the par- ents who have not adequately nurtured these children. But research has shown that adults who were unable to form a secure attachment to their parent(s) as infants may not be able to attach to their own infants with- out sensitive support and coaching (Cozolino 2006). These explanations can help educators move beyond frustration with children’s and parents’ behavior to address problems at a deeper level. COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL Attachment and the Growing Brain 15